Here I am at the end of 2010 and again just So thankful I am here. So thankful for all God has done in my life. 2009 was the hardest year of my life and while 2010 was hard it was much better than 2009. God has given me so much. Great family, Friends and a new career to be excited about.
I have learned more in the last two years about God and myself than ever before in my life. I have a new apperication for God's Grace and what that really means. I have seen God take me from April 09 to here at the end of 2010 and make me into something I never dreamed I would be. :)
December of last year I flew up to Oklahoma to see one of my dearest friends. I was still so confused on life and what God was doing. While we were at a party, my friend and two of her students started singing a song around the paino. Up until that Point I had really struggled with the fact that if my ex husband could walk out on me and all the stuff I found out about him. Find out all that really he did to me, how could God possibly still love me too. I felt abandoned (which I was by man) But, God reminded me in that very moment during that song that he never did or would abandoned me. No matter what "people" thought happened in my marraige and no matter what really happened to me in our marriage God was always there. He LOVED ME.
I sat and cried as they sang that song. It lifted my sprits and to this day when I hear that song I cry. As the reminder that God loves me and is always making a way for the best for me. He will always turn evil into good and make things point to his glory.
Here is the song:
He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realise just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.
And oh, how He loves us so,
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all
He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.
We are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking.
So Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way…
He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Passion and Football
I was so lucky to have been given a ticket and able to go to the Iron bowl this past Saturday. It was my first time to ever go to the Iron Bowl game in person. For those of you not from the Great State of Alabama, This is the biggest day in college football. Tickets are almost impossible to get to this game every year. People have parties and you must pick a side. ;)
It was the coldest game I have ever been too. Lucky for me, My mother is from up north and taught me how to dress for such occasions. The game it self ( even though the team I was pulling for lost) was amazing!! I have been to alot of college football games. However, this was the best by far. Everyone stood up the whole game. Screaming and shouting for there team. Keep in mind we were at the stadium of the team of my choice so it made it more fun I am sure.
While at the game though God began to speak to me. Odd time I know! Though standing and shacking my little red and white shaker and screaming Roll Tide, God began to slowly break my heart. In a good way. :)
I began to look around at all the people around me. There was no doubt by looking at every person you saw who they pulled for. Everyone was dressed with there teams logo or colors. Everyone was screaming and high fiving total strangers when there team did good and scored. There was no lack of passion for what was going on by anyone.
God started speaking to me saying, why does so many people have passion for a ball made of pig skin and not for me? God asked me.. Why do you have so much passion for this and not my name? Why don't you act like this in worshipping the person who created you, gave you the breath you are breathing now. Do people notice just by you sitting here that you are mine? That you have been saved by me?
Now don't get me wrong. I enjoy football and sports as much as the next person. However, I do think it is a problem when us as believers give more of our self in a game of football than we do to the one who saved us and gave his life for us.
I began to look around and started wondering how many of these "fans" actually know him personally? When I walk in a room or stadium for that matter do people know the one I worship? Do they know that my heart belongs to my king? Do I stand out as being a worshipper and follower of the Christ without even saying a word? Do I worry more about who wins a game than where the person next to me is spending eternity?
Like I said, He broke my heart in a good way. I am thankful that even in one of the loudest games and stadiums in the country that my heart was open enough to hear him speak. I pray he will keep speaking to me. I pray that I will live a life that no matter where I am or what I am doing that I shine for him. That My life, my dress and my actions will speak of what I am truly most passion about. The one who has my heart! My Lord and savior Jesus Christ!
It was the coldest game I have ever been too. Lucky for me, My mother is from up north and taught me how to dress for such occasions. The game it self ( even though the team I was pulling for lost) was amazing!! I have been to alot of college football games. However, this was the best by far. Everyone stood up the whole game. Screaming and shouting for there team. Keep in mind we were at the stadium of the team of my choice so it made it more fun I am sure.
While at the game though God began to speak to me. Odd time I know! Though standing and shacking my little red and white shaker and screaming Roll Tide, God began to slowly break my heart. In a good way. :)
I began to look around at all the people around me. There was no doubt by looking at every person you saw who they pulled for. Everyone was dressed with there teams logo or colors. Everyone was screaming and high fiving total strangers when there team did good and scored. There was no lack of passion for what was going on by anyone.
God started speaking to me saying, why does so many people have passion for a ball made of pig skin and not for me? God asked me.. Why do you have so much passion for this and not my name? Why don't you act like this in worshipping the person who created you, gave you the breath you are breathing now. Do people notice just by you sitting here that you are mine? That you have been saved by me?
Now don't get me wrong. I enjoy football and sports as much as the next person. However, I do think it is a problem when us as believers give more of our self in a game of football than we do to the one who saved us and gave his life for us.
I began to look around and started wondering how many of these "fans" actually know him personally? When I walk in a room or stadium for that matter do people know the one I worship? Do they know that my heart belongs to my king? Do I stand out as being a worshipper and follower of the Christ without even saying a word? Do I worry more about who wins a game than where the person next to me is spending eternity?
Like I said, He broke my heart in a good way. I am thankful that even in one of the loudest games and stadiums in the country that my heart was open enough to hear him speak. I pray he will keep speaking to me. I pray that I will live a life that no matter where I am or what I am doing that I shine for him. That My life, my dress and my actions will speak of what I am truly most passion about. The one who has my heart! My Lord and savior Jesus Christ!
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
New Start!
This is my New Blog up and running. I had some problems with the other one. Sometimes when the truth comes out it hurts. I feel so sorry for people who live a Lie. To the point of almost Believeing it themselves.This blog and my last blog was and is about Truth. It is about my journey on this road called life. I know God always brings things to light. Truth can never be hidden forever. I hold true to that.
I titled this Blog Living Plan B. I feel as though that is what I am doing. Even though I know the journey I am on was no suprise to God and this is his Plan A. I know one day I will look back and see his whole plan.
I went and saw my favorite singer in Concert Sunday Night. Yes, the one and only Steven Curtis Chapman. It was his family really. It was a " Night with the Chapmans" His two sons band did a set and then SCC himself did a bunch of songs. Then his wife Mary Beth came and spoke. The whole night was AMAZING! As every SCC concert is.
His son talked about how this past year he was praying and God was telling him how life is like a huge painting. At that moment his nose was right up next to the painting. However, Soon God would slowly taking him back step by step to see the whole masterpiece painting he had created with his life. I know that is what God is doing with me. Right now my nose is SO close up to the painting I can't see what God is doing with my life. I stand firm in believing that God is not done with me yet. He is making a masterpiece with my life for him. One day I will see it all! I am so thankful I serve a God who Loves me more than anything. Even when people in my life walk away who never should have walked away or given up. God never gives up. He never throws in the towel and says " it is not worth it" He works everyday at pulling me more and more to him. Pursuing me and Loving me like no other.
I titled this Blog Living Plan B. I feel as though that is what I am doing. Even though I know the journey I am on was no suprise to God and this is his Plan A. I know one day I will look back and see his whole plan.
I went and saw my favorite singer in Concert Sunday Night. Yes, the one and only Steven Curtis Chapman. It was his family really. It was a " Night with the Chapmans" His two sons band did a set and then SCC himself did a bunch of songs. Then his wife Mary Beth came and spoke. The whole night was AMAZING! As every SCC concert is.
His son talked about how this past year he was praying and God was telling him how life is like a huge painting. At that moment his nose was right up next to the painting. However, Soon God would slowly taking him back step by step to see the whole masterpiece painting he had created with his life. I know that is what God is doing with me. Right now my nose is SO close up to the painting I can't see what God is doing with my life. I stand firm in believing that God is not done with me yet. He is making a masterpiece with my life for him. One day I will see it all! I am so thankful I serve a God who Loves me more than anything. Even when people in my life walk away who never should have walked away or given up. God never gives up. He never throws in the towel and says " it is not worth it" He works everyday at pulling me more and more to him. Pursuing me and Loving me like no other.
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